Barnaby Bacon
Name Given at Birth: Barnaby Bacon
Nicknames: B, Barns, Bacon
Hometown or where you were born: Dover
Current Residence: Canterbury
Age: 15 years old
Class: Lower
What do you do, your main function in life/society: I was the King's Jester, but when he realized I wasn't funny he fired me. Now I am unemployed, so I convince people to beg to the King to give me my job back.
Have you ever gone skinny-dipping / do you know how to swim: I have gone skinny-dipping (that's funny, right?), but unfortunately my father never took time to teach me how to swim….I guess it wasn't smart of me to jump in naked, huh?
Do you make fun of people: Of course! It may be impolite, but people are so offended now by the smallest thing that there must be one person in there right mind to do something liberal and unheard of.
Favorite Color: I'm color blind. Funny, huh?
Have you ever committed or been convicted of a crime: Yes, the mayor of Dover thought I wasn't funny enough to be a Jester, apparently he considered that to be a crime. That is why I left Dover and came to Canterbury. That didn't help much.
Closest friends/How did you meet: The pigs. There's not much to do when you are unemployed…so I befriended a local farmer's pigs.
One Pillow or two: One. I can't afford another pillow!
Pets: I do like to joke that the satyrs are my pets.
Favorite Type of Music: The Bagpipes, they make me giggle.
Hobbies/Pastimes: Juggling: It is not only my striving profession, but also a hobby.
Personal Hygiene: Is that really your business? But, since you asked it is some what poor. I befriended a pig, remember!
Favorite Food: Lamb.
Are your parents alive, do you get along with them: They are dead.
If your parents are dead, when and how did they die: When I was twelve. They were attempting the world's first human juggling act…it didn't work so well.
Favorite place to relax: In the Enchanted Forest where I can watch the Fairies.
Favorite Holy Day / Why: Fridays, more meat for me!
Favorite Drink: Ale.
What's your bedtime: When the sun sets.
What, if anything, do you usually wear on your feet: I sport some lovely 'jester' shoes that curve up and are in a colorful fashion.
Are you married or single: I am single; it's hard to find love when you can't be serious and connect on a deep level.
Do you have a family / who are they: No. My parents passed away and I had no siblings.
Favorite Entertainment: The Jester. Even though they may be competition you can't help but smile when you see a Jester.
Favorite Subject in School or Chore growing up: Going to the market with my mother.
Least Favorite Subject in School or Chore growing up: Milking the cows.
Favorite Sport: I never took an interest in sports, but if juggling and card tricks are considered sports, then I would say that.
Most Humiliating Moment: My life is one long humiliating moment! No one can take a Jester serious. They just laugh.
Proudest Moment: When I became the Court Jester of Canterbury. I finally felt like somebody.
Craziest Person or silliest you know: The Vulgarian of questionable gender. She…I mean he…it is well, just odd. Nobody ever can tell what exactly is going on with him….I mean her…
What do you look for in the opposite sex: Some one who can make me laugh, but is not as funny as I am. Preferably, some one who has land, money, and will put me in a better social/financial position than I am in now.
In our Hierarchical Society everybody has somebody "over" them, Who is your immediate "overlord": That would be almost everybody. When I was employed it was the Royal Court and the King, himself. Now it is just about everyone, except the Dung Dealer Family and the Gypsies.
Favorite Sport to watch: I love to watch the jousting. What is more hilarious than a man knocking another man off a horse?!
Do you remember your first kiss: Yes, it was with a fish (it was a dare). Well, what do you expect from a Jester? It was funny and spontaneous…ha just like a regular kiss!
Do you keep in touch with your childhood friends: Not at all. I was the class clown then, so why would I want them to know what I am now?
Where is your favorite "Vacation" spot: I never have been outside of Kent. Sitting by the sea (when I was in Dover), and walking through the forest make me relax.
Have you ever been overseas: No.
Do you have Dirt/Mud floors or Stone: Dirt.
What is your bed made of: Straw.
How many people sleep in your bed: Just me.
10 Things Everybody Should Know About Me:
1. I am judgmental.
2. I do whatever I can to get a laugh.
3. I need a job, so out of my way!
4. I think juggling invisibly is just the same as regular juggling.
5. Only a real man can sport a jester's hat.
6. King Henry doesn't know what real humor is!
7. Children love my act (hint*hint* Your Majesty).
8. I think you are never too old to have fun.
9. On the other hand I think there should be a minimum 'having fun' age.
10. I may be rejected, but that only makes it more comical!