Sasha Boleyn
Name Given at Birth: Aleksandr Aleksy Martinovich Boleyn, very pleased to meet you.
Nicknames: Sasha (pronounced Sah-Shah), or on rare occasions, Alyosha, for my middle name.
Hometown or where you were born: I was born on the road, somewhere between Lisbon and Moscow. The only hometown I might have (other than the road) would be Canterbury, for we return here more often than any other town.
Current Residence: My current residence is always the same; wherever the Vardos are circled is where I reside.
Age: 19 (I shall be 20 years at summer's coming)
Class: I am one of the sons of the greatest Gypsy that ever was to live, so I would say my class is Royalty of the Road, Prince of Peregrination, or Ambling Aristocracy.
What do you do, your main function in life/society: I travel across the known world with the kumpania, doing what needs to be done, and entertaining at nearly every village we come across. My main duties for the kumpania are to take care of the Great Cats we trade to the very wealthy (and sometimes the very foolish). I keep them fed with plenty of fresh meats to keep them docile, and well groomed to keep them from smelling worse than Slavvo. So far I have not been directly involved in any of Papa's "operations," but I do assist in planning sometimes, and making sure he has all he needs to perform extraordinarily, especially in extraordinary circumstances. I am also always looking to improve our regular equipment, such as larger, lighter Vardos, to carry more and a wider assortment of goods.
Have you ever gone skinny-dipping / do you know how to swim: Is there any other way to swim but in the state of nature? Clothing takes too long to dry if you swim in it, and it makes you slower (sometimes very important to have good speed in the water).
Do you make fun of people: Only those with whom I am friends, and only good-naturedly.
Favorite colour: Green. All the shades of green, from the dark of the Vulgarian woods, that found in the prettiest girls’ eyes, and to the lightest of new leaves. Whenever you may see green, you may see life and mirth, for green is always growing.
Have you ever committed or been convicted of a crime: Never! I could never be convicted of such a thing as this "crime" of which you speak. Unless it is crime to steal the heart of every maid from Portugal to the Orient. Of course, it is not much of one if their hearts are stolen again by a certain older brother of mine.
Closest Friends: All of my brothers are my closest friends, along with everyone traveling in our kumpania. On the road you must be friends or be lost. I am also close friends with every girl I meet, though some do not know it as yet.
One pillow or two: There are those who do use two pillows, but this is simple extravagance. Why use two when one will do just as well. I am very hardy, and sometimes I use no pillow (though by no fault of my own. Another of my brothers is fond of filching my feathered head-fender).
Pets: We keep no pets in the Vardos. It would be unnecessary work. I might consider the Great Cats we trade (and which I am currently trying to train to perform) pets if they did not try to eat me so often.
Favorite type of music: Anything played by Bibi Leonora which you can dance to. The upbeat tempos are enough to lift my heart from any woe.
Hobbies/Pastimes: I enjoy very much to read, very much to write in imitation of that which I read. I have devoured every writing which Papa has gifted me with, and I continue to read or write something every day. And of course I like to build various apparatuses and mechanisms in my free time. Some of the things I make are not so practical (like the broom for cleaning the tops of the vardos), but some are very useful (the broom for cleaning the Great Cats from outside their cage, and the special stilts I designed to hide tools silently inside). I am also secretly training some of the lions to perform. They do not like to dance, but they will roar ferociously on command. If nothing else, they will fetch more coin from a nobleman to impress his friends.
Personal Hygiene: My Greek is not so good, but I do live well, wherever I may travel.
Favorite Food: Fish! I love any kind of fish, especially with rice, or with bread, or with more fish. I especially enjoy the fish dishes of the Far East, they smell wonderful, and the taste is like nothing any Gaje has ever experienced.
Are your parents alive, do you get along with them: My father is very much alive, along with his current wife. Papa and I get along very well, as long as I keep up with my chores. Mitri I do not see very often, for she stays in Canterbury all of the year, but when we do meet again we always make up for time lost, and she enjoys it very much to see all her new sons, even though she does not always seem to.
If your parents are dead, when and how did they die: The mother who gave me life died as I came into the world. Although I did not know her, Papa tells me I am very much like her, and this makes me like her very much.
Favorite place to relax: With me it is not so much where, but with who/what. If there are good friends or a good book, any place is a good place to relax. If there is a tree present, so much the better.
Favorite Holy Day / Why: Yule is by far the best of all Holy Days, for it is only this week that we are allowed to do no chores, and all our time is spent in celebration. When the whole of the family is gathered, it is the wildest and most fun of any celebration, rivaling even the revels at the Harvest Festival. It also pleases me very much to give inventions of mine as gifts, and I strive all year long to create the perfect item for each of my family.
Favorite Drink: The best drink is that quaffed after a long period of good hard work. Be it a flagon of wine, cool water, or an herbal tea, work makes any drink sweet.
What is your bedtime: I try to be to sleep in between Guido and Papa. It is not difficult to be asleep after Guido, and if I am doing my chores quick like as I should, I am usually asleep before Papa checks the encampment the last time for the night. On nights of celebration, however, I am awake until I am no longer able to stand, and must crawl under the vardo to sleep.
What, if anything, do you wear on your feet: I wear my sandals if I am to be shod, and the dust of the road if not.
Are you married or single: I am unmarried, for Papa and I have not yet agreed on a wife for me. The women he finds are wonderful, but I want the girl I marry to have a certain, special something. I do not know yet what it is, but I will know when I find her.
Do you have a family/who are they: Of course I have a family! There is Papa, the greatest Gypsy to ever walk all of the roads to Rome and back, his wife and my newest Mitri, and Bibi Leonora, Bibi Belladonna, and then there are my brothers and sister. Martino, Santiago, Lucianna, Nikolai, Evgeny, Gregor, Slavvo, Tito and Guido, Benvolio, Cesar, and Luca.
- Martino is the eldest of the brothers, and he leads the kumpania when Papa is away. Well, he did, until he was imprisoned by the nasty French on made-up charges of being a spy. The family came swiftly to liberate him as Justice would demand, however, and he is now recuperating in a land far from where the French court cannot reach. I aided in the event by providing the special stilts upon which Nikolai and Evgeny secured Martino’s freedom.
- Santiago is Martino’s (slightly younger) twin brother. He is not so hard-working as Martino, but he eats just as much, maybe more. He is also no longer in our caravan. He was invited to join Bibi Belladonna’s caravan, and he leapt at the chance, as much as he can leap. He is very good to us, often he would help Nikolai think of excuses for to tell Papa when he had been out too late or under suspicious circumstances.
- Lucianna is our only sister, but she works harder than any three of my brothers combined. She is very dedicated to keeping this caravan going, overseeing much of the day-to-day operations and keeping us all in trousers and with full bellies.
- Nikolai’s favorite pastime, it seems to me, is to be gone from the caravan and carousing with gaje girls. Papa is not happy about this at all, but the gaje have prettier faces than Papa. All the attention the girls shower upon him is like rain and sunshine upon his ego, and sometimes makes it very hard for the rest of us to fit in the same vardo with him. If he were not so good a brother, he would have us to stay with the gaje many times over. That is probably another reason he stays around, he has the soul of a gypsy, and must ever be searching for another pretty.
- Evgeny is closest to my own age, but he is still a little older. He is the most talented artist I have ever known. Ever since I can remember he is always drawing or sketching or painting, or thinking about them. He is also skilled in metallurgical arts, and is keeping the wheels in good shape. If you were to ask him to make anything more beautiful, and came back for it in a day, you would hardly recognize it for the skill into which he has put it. But for all his skill with a brush and hammer, his tongue is just as skillful. When he was very busy one day with his painting, he convinced me, against my better judgment, to go buy a new wheel in town, so he would not have to fix it that day. I knew it was Evgeny’s responsibility to care for the wheels, but somehow he talked me into going into town for him anyhow.
- Gregor is a quiet one, but he seems to become looser around the jaw when there are drinks and gaje girls about. He is still very impressed by some of them, to the disappointment of Papa. Papa will tell you of the ink on his chest as positive proof of this. He works hard, though even perhaps to a fault. Sometimes Nikolai or Guido will ask him to do their chores while they are away in a village. Either that, or he goes along with them, which is more often than the prior circumstance.
- Slavvo takes inspiration from the great bards of time, and is so skilled a dancer that is the first boy of his age to dance in Angelus de Maestro. Always is he running in his head lines from some play he has heard, or is making one up on the spot. So too, does he tell a story with such passion that he must stand and act the parts as they come, and you would almost believe that they stand before you in the flesh, and not Slavvo. I have known him too, to see more plays than any of the rest of us brothers, as time allows of course.
- Tito is looking always to the horizon, imagining what strange people might be over in the next valley or around the next mountain. He is quickest to laugh, as well. I remember that when he was younger he would wander far at night, but somehow he would find his way back to the vardos. It would be very difficult to lose him anywhere, so skilled is he at navigation and pathfinding. This is very good, for he can always find a good pond or stream for swimming in, and the easiest ways to get almost anywhere.
- Guido is very strange. Always seems his mind to be on something other than what he ought to be doing. Unless he is looking for a model to paint, of course. It seems this is the only time he shows single-mindedness in anything. Often is the time he is thinking of some girl, and rehearsing what he will say to her as he should be tending to his chores, and many times he has rolled over toes with his wheelbarrow headed in the wrong direction. But he tells comic stories very well, or acts a buffoon for everyone’s entertainment. He is very good at acting the buffoon, almost as good as he is at filching extra pillows whenever he decides to take a nap.
- Benvolio is destined to be a very wealthy gypsy some day. Always he thinks of some scheme or another to garner more coin. Once he and I were talking, and he remarked that the big cats we had recently started to trade in could be made much more valuable if they were able to be trained. He has many good ideas such as this, and truly is a great asset to the kumpania, as well as being a great brother.
- Cesar is a performer like Slavvo, but he sings and dances so very well that Troupe Festivale has insisted in his joining them. He writes to us very often and tells us of the adventures he has seen, and we sometimes feel badly for teasing him so often when he was younger. But it has made him strong, and he does very well. We are proud to call him brother.
- Luca is the smallest of all of us, but it seems he has the biggest heart of all of us. He is very promising as a poet, and has a very acute mind that sees much. You know this by the questions he asks of Papa. He has not yet learned of guile, and I hope when he does (as everyone must) he does in a way which does not harm him. Benvolio sometimes expresses that he feels Luca does not do his share of the work, but he is young yet. Although… I seem to have done much more when I was his age. Perhaps it only the distortion that is so common with childhood memories.
Favorite entertainment: The most favored entertainment for me is seeing one of my devices all the way through to completion. Oftentimes, I am slightly ambitious in my undertakings, but when something really comes together well, and works as I intended it, then are my moments of greatest entertainment. The flying vardos, for example. To see them at the head of the column, brightly painted and filled almost to bursting with the goods in which we trade, knowing it is from my own mind from which the wonderful creations are sprung, that is what gives me great pleasure.
Favorite subject in school, or chore growing up: I did not go to a school. Schools are for the children of those who choose to imprison themselves within an imaginary box and call it "property." That is not to say, however, that I did not receive an education. I have spoken with great minds in every country I have visited. Men of philosophy in Greece, men of science in France, men of the arts in Italy, men of the sword in Spain, men of statecraft in England, men of the earth in Germany, men of the sea in Portugal, and men of the hunt in Scandinavia. Favored of all was my time in Italy, for there are many men of learning of all types.
Least favorite subject in school, or chore growing up: My least favorite chore which I still do with much haste, is to clean the vardos of the Great Cats. They have grown accustomed to my mane, which I think makes them mistake me for a small one of them, so they do not try to eat me so much, but they leave a mess in one corner which is almost enough to burn off your eyes when the sun is high. I think I might have a way to expedite the process, however.
Favorite sport: To swim is to be as free as a fish. Swimming is very good exercise, as well, for it keeps you lean and limber, without all the pain that lifting heavy crates into and out of the vardos put in my back and legs before I built the Vardo-Vinch. Down and up, left and right, hither and yon, a fish of the sea is a great traveler, and much to be admired. Plus, they are tasty.
Most humiliating moment: I had finished all of my chores a little early, as I sometimes do, and I decided to go swimming for to cool off. I packed myself a bit of dried fish, a roll, and some cheese to have as a snack afterwards. Down I went to the pool that Tito and I had found, and had a good swim. In the middle of the pond, I looked to the shore, and saw a great brown hairy beast sniffing at my breeches. As I looked, it grabbed them up in its mouth and ambled away into the woods. I decided at this time that it might be a good time to stop swimming, and perhaps retrieve my coverings. It had rained the day before, and I was able to track the bear with great ease. I followed from a long way behind, keeping the wind always in my face. He then stopped in a clearing, and proceeded to tear my pants into ribbons of brightly coloured and slightly slobbery cloth. The worst part of the whole thing was that the bear had the nerve to eat my fish popkin. Oh, and I also had to walk back to the Vardos in naught but my skin.
Proudest moment: Until I am married and have a strong family of at least ten sons, my proudest moment shall be when I unveiled my first properly working invention to my Papa. It was not much, but it was very useful (as portable wagon-winches generally are) and I had built it by myself. The look in my Papa's eyes when I showed him how it worked made me the proudest boy in the whole of Europe.
Craziest or silliest person you know: It is a tie between Nikolai and Guido, both my brothers. Nikolai is the craziest person I know, for sneaking to the village at every opportunity, with the full knowledge that Papa will find out is certainly an indicator of lunacy. Guido is the silliest, for he is blissfully unaware of some of the ridiculous things he does.
What do you look for in the opposite sex? Long, curly hair of darkest obsidian, flashing green eyes of purest emeralds, and such skill with a cookpot so as to make the Pope himself weep.
In our hierarchical society everybody has somebody "over" them; who is your immediate "overlord?" Ai, Papa of course! The greatest gypsy ever to wander all the roads to Rome and back again.
How do you feel about that person? How does anyone feel about their papa? I love him of course, but I also respect him more than I can any king, he is a man of such honor and passion that if I am half of the man he is when I am old, I shall be a very great man indeed.
Favorite sport to watch: I enjoy watching Nikolai and Evgeny try to talk their way out of trouble with Papa. I have to make sure I am hard at work while I do, but it is still very much fun listening to their wonderful tales.
Do you remember your first kiss? How could I ever forget? It was a scant three summers ago, on the shore of the warm sea in southern Spain. I had finished my chores, and went to the sea for a long swim. Returning to the rocks on which my clothes were piled, I noticed her looking at me, grinning with such a marvelous smile that I nearly walked right out of the ocean to speak with her. I remembered I had on no clothes in time, though, and called to her to turn around before I would come up to talk to her. In no way would I allow myself to be caught in such a compromising position with a girl I had not even met yet. I always insist on meeting the girls first. She made a sad face, but turned and walked a few paces away. I was into my breeches as fast as I was able, and as soon as I was, she turned around again with her beautiful smile. We walked along the beach for a long time, talking infrequently, for she did know much Spanish, and I knew even less of the Arabian tongue. We found an outcropping of rocks where we rested, and watched as the sun went down, seeming to set the beach ablaze as it dropped in the west. I looked at her, and her dazzling green eyes shone in the falling light, when her eyes met mine. I am ever thankful that kisses translate into all languages. Time, however, is known to be very punctual, and the night was almost totally upon us, and Papa had sent Evgeny looking for me. I heard him calling me, and I promised her I would be back the next night. Tragically, the kumpania left early the next day, and I have never seen my lovely green-eyed Malaika since.
Where is your favorite "vacation" spot? I do not know this word, "vacation." You say it is when you travel to a place far away, and spend time doing nothing but relax, is that correct? Yes? Alright. We gypsies do half of that all the time, and the other half none of the time. I think we gypsies are always on a half-"vacation" then. This is much better than on a whole vacation only one time a year for a short time.
Have you ever been overseas? We would soon run out of new places to visit if we never went over the seas. Many times have I accompanied Papa to lands wild and new. It is over one of these seas I first saw the Great Cats, and when we got back to Europe, we had some with us.
Do you have dirt/mud floors or stone? It depends on whether it is raining or cold. When it is raining, we have mud floors. When it is warm, we have dirt floors. When it is cold, we have stone floors, sometimes with a dazzling carpet of purest white for decoration.
What is your bed made of? It is a lightweight, collapsible bed made from canvas and wood. High enough to keep me dry when the ground is wet, and small enough to fit in a vardo when the skies are wet.
How many people have slept in your bed? Only one at a time, and usually it is I. But sometimes one of my brothers helps by "testing" it for me. Papa says I may make a larger one when I have a wife to fill it. Papa would prefer if I had to make a very large bed.
10 Things Everybody Should Know About Me
10. Invite me along if you wish to get close to the Great Cats. My mane makes them more comfortable around strangers.
9. Also invite me along if you like good company. I am ready with a song or tale nearly any moment you wish.
8. I, like my Papa, enjoy working hard, and it makes me irritated when there is work to be done, but not all hands are to it.
7. Do not let me catch you at making sport of any of my little brothers. You will find yourself in a rather uncomfortable position in a very short amount of time.
6. I enjoy hearing a good tale even more than spinning one, and am always eager for new books, songs, stories, and poems.
5. I believe it was Archimedes who said, "Give me a long enough lever, and I can move the world." I say, "Give me enough time and material, and I shall build that lever."
4. My exploits may not yet be as grand or as far-reaching as those of my Papa, but that can soon be changed, for mine is the heart of the Gypsy.
3. I am very strong-willed, and do not budge easily from any position. However, sound reasoning is not lost on my ears.
2. If the gateway to a man's heart is through the stomach, the key to my heart is a good fish curry.
1. Above all, I enjoy good food, good tales and good companions. I would trade all the gold and gems in the world for the wonderful life of a gypsy.